To me, alignment is something both bigger than and more foundational than being alike. Alignment asks: Are we going in the same general direction? Do our fundamental ideals allow us to do some good work together? Maybe we won’t do everything together, but when we’re aligned, we can see that there is something to do together. 

Change need not be a big deal. Not changing the entire system, shifting infrastructure, addressing oppression or “swallowing the ocean” as a colleague of mine says. But, rather, taking a sip, seeing a small impact that is entirely within our ability to make, getting started, seeing what happens, and moving from there.

When with new peoples, I continue to be mindful of asking ahead of time what to be aware of, inquiring about honorifics and titles, and generally stepping back and listening. And also, I have to be careful not to get too earnest and in my own head about this stuff. Folks are generally kind and while I may mess up—and someone will let me know and practice grace!—it’s best for me to go forward humble but unafraid.

We were literally doing something that had never been done before: bringing together governments’ employees who were aboriginal. Can you imagine the amount of goodwill in the space with people being together for the first time as a group? As they found themselves and each other? As they explored their own leadership? And from that goodwill, some really powerful learning and work was done.

Tim Merry and I are working together to create a model for systems change that has equity at the center. Check out our video below to see some of what we're up to... it's both exciting and daunting!

What would it mean—how might we change our practice—if equity were not simply a longed for goal, but rather a return to a natural state? The idea feels edgy for me, but in a good way and definitely worth exploring. Here are some of our reflections on a short video blog:

It’s hard. Sometimes it sucks. No one at my house (including me) is happy about these two back to back trips, but I know I’m making the best decisions I can while navigating an engaging, intense, inspiring family and work life. It’s not a matter of importance. They’re both important. And when you have more than one important thing in your life, things don’t always line up perfectly. That’s the truth, and you just gotta figure things out from there.

Three clear messages about different ways of “knowing” in less than 24 hours? I’m pretty pragmatic, but even I know that there is a persistent tapping on my shoulder right now telling me to listen more closely to my heart. To listen to something beyond the way my brain is trying to sort things out right now.

Intent is not impact. You’ll hear this phrase a lot in social justice circles. It’s based on the understanding that our actions may not have the consequences we desire, and that just because we didn’t mean for something to turn out the way that it did, doesn’t mean that we aren’t responsible. 

For Tim and I, the resolution is in our practicing relationship with each other, day in and day out, with its inevitable hurts and with a commitment to learning from each other. This resolution in relationship is not neat and tidy, but more real, deep, and entirely based in practicing together.